Wednesday Wednesday! The Great X-Factor Homage Mystery

It's that time of year again. Time for Simon Cowell to smugly smirk his way to the bank and Louis Walsh to piss and bitch and threaten to quit, and he really means it this time.

But despite my best attempts to avoid this wretched festival of auto-tune and humiliation, certain tidbits seem to seep through into my daily intake every fucking year. And what's really piqued my interest this time around is the naming of one of the girl groups.

This group of dowdy young things, pictured above, go by the name of Belle Amie.

Belle Amie, Bell Amee, Bellamy.

Yes these girls have obviously been so affected by someone by the name of Bellamy, they thought to name their desperate stab at fleeting fame after them. But who is this influential figure, this totem of virtue and inspiration that has so impressed themselves upon these impressionable young ladies? Well, I have a few theories.

1) Craig Bellamy
This no-necked Welsh footballer with his simian brow seems like an odd choice for some sweet young poplets to name themselves after. Famed for his bad boy attitude and assaulting a team-mate with a golf club, this is maybe an outside shot.

2)Matt Bellamy
One of the nice guys of rock and roll, the front-man of Muse seems like another odd choice. With his falsetto voice and indulgent guitar riffs he is, at least, one step closer to the girls' choice of career, but they don't seem as concerned with such weighty themes as the apocalypse and desperation in the face of seeming unimportance as he is.

3)David Bellamy

Noted environmental activist and television personality David Bellamy was one of the first people to raise concerns over man's impact on nature. With his television appearances and books such as 1989's 'The Greenhouse Effect' he voiced his concerns to the British public. He also voiced an advert for Ribena. Maybe the girls are big blackcurrant fans?


So there we have it. After an extensive bout of research, I am no closer to finding out the truth in this elusive mystery. Are these four girls, chasing the dreams of fame and fortune like so many before them, Welsh football fans? Or do they secretly hold dreams of becoming the next stadium rock sensation? Or do they simply really love juice?